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Story Info

Posting Date 2007-10-09 22:23:53
Author Wildinside2
Title Kayla
Category lost someone I loved (e.g. died)
Where it happend Central oregon
Age then 18
Age now 33
Gender FEMALE
Viewed 31
Story Length 627
Status
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Kayla

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Kayla

I haven’t thought about her in awhile, but I woke up this morning and I had dreamed about her. She held a special place in my heart. I loved her so much, so when I think about her now I feel a small twinge of pain inside. She probably doesn’t remember and wouldn’t remember because it’s been so long and she was young. A special memory I have is teaching her how to sing Chicago’s “Hard to Say I’m Sorry,” and her singing it back in that way that only a young child can. She didn’t know all the words, could remember them all, but she knew the tune and the right places to insert the words she knew. My sisters and I used to play this game. I would sing a line from a song and stop and they would fill in the blank; we did this frequently. It was fun, especially with the little ones, especially with Kayla.
Kayla was one of the cutest babies I’d ever seen. She was this gorgeous little brown butterball with chunky round thighs and cheeks. Her eyes reminded me of a Samoyed puppy for some reason; they were adorably squinted. She’d come from Peru and was a Quechua Indian. She was named for one of my favorite soap opera characters of all time, from Days of Our Lives.
Though my mom never watched the soap opera, her mother, my grandmother, was a long time fan of the show. I used to spend extra time with Kayla, playing with her and bringing her to my room.
It makes me wonder; if, when she ever hears Hard to Say I’m Sorry does it make her feel a certain way or claw through the memories in her mind to something she can’t quite remember? She knew the part of the chorus “Hold me now.” She couldn’t say all the words of the next line, but she knew “hard” and “I’m sorry.” She would mumble out the rest holding the tune. In the verses we would sing the lines and stop for the last word, which she knew and would sing. We’d sing, “Everybody needs a little time.” Then Kayla would sing, “away.”
“I heard her-”
Kayla: “Say.”
A picture I have of Kayla somewhere is from when she is 3 or 4 or older. She is sitting in a little chair and whoever took the picture got her to laugh; also, she’s holding up one of her arms high into the air which made me think of a silly monkey. I like that picture. I remember the day she came home as a baby, and somewhere I have a picture from then. She was wearing this one piece baby outfit that was pastel green and white. I think she was wearing glasses in the “monkey picture.”
She went to a family in Bend, and someone said she’d become a basket case. A family friend and attorney had passed on information she gleaned from the system for awhile. I think they kept her first name. What does Kayla look like now? Is she happy and healthy? Does she know there are a handful of strangers to her now that once loved her so dearly? Do she and the others have holes in their lives or their hearts because they used to be part of some other family? Someday I would like to know. Someday I would like to see her again and tell her how special she was to me and the others and how much we loved her. Sadly I wouldn’t even know how old she currently is. I can’t recall her birthdate.


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